secret societies

when i was child , i see movies about spying and secret societies like masonic , gays , and mush more like that .
like every child , he dreamed about something special for him , and as we all know heroes in that movies are always special in everything power , looking , they always cute , handsome , open minded and sexy , so i was looking always to be one like them in a secret society , it does not matter what kind of society it be , all i was looking for being one like this heroes .

now , from ..... years i be a member of one of those gay society , but for my dam luck i am in the middle east area where people do not like gays , they do not accept them as people like them have rights so it became me secret .

people do not know that that society here in that area is huge and has all over 3 million person
most who respect himself they travel outside that dam area , they travel to other countries where people can accept them as they are , where they can not hid from people all the time , where they can show their felling without fried of seeing by someone

why people here do not do that , i do not know
i hope that day is coming when people accept us as who are we gays
gays who has hopeless from that they travel outside , i hope i see that day before i be one of them